If you only knew...
...how much this pain hurts.

I only remember two kisses - the first and the last. The first, with my love and the last, with death.
You will never know what you have until it isn't yours anymore. Heartbreak can tear a person up inside. Love at first sight is sometimes a Hollywood myth unless you believe, like me, that it can happen.

My Style

This is why I did it...
The darkness that engulfs me
It seems like it is real.
It makes me tense and worried
With how I really feel.

Some say that it will pass,
Others say the end is near.
But this life of solitude
Has been here for a year.

I try my hardest to pass it,
To make everything okay.
But every time I try,
I fail,
And don’t want to face the coming day.

I’ve got one thing left to try,
If it fails then I am done.
I feel the rage take over me,
I count backwards,
10 to 1.

As I stare at the photo
Of exactly how they were.
My head starts to ache,
My heart starts to pound,
My vision becomes a blur.

He has her in his arms,
She lives him;
Same as I.
I hurt the picture to the wall
And silently begin to cry.

I know they are not together,
It was never meant to be.
I still cringe when I see her,
Even though he’s with me.

The music slowly plays
With every picture that I see.
I can’t bare to watch the photos,
He’s so happy…
Without me.

I’m sobbing in my room,
In my head it’s his name I call.
I clutch the disk,
I grit my teeth
As it flies against the wall.

I wanted it to shatter,
It’s in one piece I’ve found,
The rage is building,
As I fiercely hit the ground.

I don’t know why I watched it,
It only brings me pain.
But that is why I did it,
So I can feel that pain again.

The Site of My Darkness